Changing Your Story

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Sometimes we find ourselves in a familiar place where an issue, problem or block comes up again. Maybe it’s a habit we thought we’d let go of, or a relationship that we continue to struggle with. Perhaps it’s a pattern that we’re becoming aware of, a set of conditioned reactions we’ve been repeating over the years. It may be a thought, belief or question. Whatever it is, we know we’ve been here before.

It’s easy to feel frustrated in these moments, to blame ourselves or someone else - “Why can’t they just act right? Why is this still an issue? Haven’t I gotten over this already?”

No, we haven’t.

When we realize we’ve been walking around with this old baggage and projecting it out into the world, and are now seeing it reflected around us, our minds create the story about it. We may feel guilty or ashamed for not having “fixed” this issue. We may be angry or disappointed in others for the role they play in our pattern. Seeing the parts of ourselves which are not in alignment with our highest self-image can be uncomfortable and make us resent our vulnerability. And our minds can take all of that and tell us something is wrong with us.

But what if we created a different story?

What if when we are presented with these patterns, habits, beliefs - these shadows - we could reframe our thinking and see it as an opportunity to learn something? What if we could have compassion for ourselves and hold space for whatever feelings come up, and allow ourselves to move through into a different response? What if we showed up for ourselves with kindness, instead of judgment, for having the self-awareness to realize what’s happening?

What if we gave ourselves permission to fully experience what needs to be healed?

It’s okay to be in a process of learning.
It’s okay to not be “over it”.

The next time you find yourself in a familiar place of struggle, I invite you to be fully present. I invite you to pause and really see what’s happening. Check in with yourself. Own what you’re feeling. Let it grow and expand and fill the room. Know what you feel. And have gratitude for this moment of clarity.

Then, ask yourself how you would like to respond. How can you create a different outcome? How can you change the story?

Our feelings are not facts, but they give us a lot of information. What are your feelings telling you? What needs to change and shift for you to be happier, healthier and live your highest potential? What action can you empower yourself to take in order to move forward into a new way of being?

Trust your intuition. You are more powerful than you know.


If you need support and tools for creating a more mindful process around reframing patterns, I look forward to connecting over a session.

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Kyana Brindle